Monday, June 30, 2008

Talk by Ezra Taft Bensen

I was listening to this talk today on my ipod and thought it was amazing. We really do live in times spoken of in the scriptures. It is amazing to think that Christ could come in our day. Are we prepared?

I think as we see the world around us and watch the news we can see the signs and wonders happening. The world has always had tragedies. I am not blind or dumb to that. And I know that wars have happened for thousands of years and they will rage on still. But I think the wide spread wickedness, the plague of pornography and the evidence that nature is showing her power is evidence enough that the time will come soon. In the Lords time of course.

When the Lord comes, will I be ready? I have been thinking a lot about that lately. What do I need to do in order to have the spirit be my guide, to be firm in my testimony of Christ? I think the answers lie in building a stronger relationship with my father in heaven, by reading my scriptures more and through diligent prayer.

I love the assurance that if we are prepared, we shall not fear. I was thinking in Sunday School how when you watch a movie where you know the ending and have read the book, you still are anxious and can be frightened. We will still watch as things happen as the time draws near and feel strong emotions of sadness, anxiousness, and fear. But we now Christ will come and be victorious. I love the ending.

The beginning of a new blog

So how many times have I done this? Started a new bl0g and then never written in it? Well, I will admit I was pretty fervent about my LiveJournal. I was on that all the time, but mostly for the art.

The semester is coming to an end. It wasn't an easy one either. I feel like there were supposed to be so many lessons to learn, and that I was incapable of obtaining them all. Its all over in two weeks and then I am back home to Vancouver. I usually await the end of the school year with excitement and plans, but this time... nada. I need an internship really bad!

I was finally able to send my graphic design portfolio to someone for the first time. It's so funny how ashamed I am of the artwork I have done. I have this weird obsession with being below average and am afraid that I will be put on the butchers block and torn apart for not being great. The stem of this I feel comes from how we are critiqued in art classes. Everyone sets thier work on the board, a type of offering to the Art Gods. Then you watch and listen as you are told your offering is like Cain's. And then you are banished to the depths of walking the earth for eternity with the sad realization what you did, just didn't make the cut. It is all about my fears. NO ART GOD SHOULD CONTROL ME! I can overcome my fears and give up the silly notion that takes me to the same sorrowful spots over and over again. I usually am willing to do everything to get myself to the point where I need to be and then when I stand there, I want a new direction. I have dreams for plans. What I really need is some plans for my dreams. I need to decide what I need to do to get me there. I am an adult for goodness sakes! I should have decided this a few years ago.